And the waiting continues for the next step in gathering all the information needed to battle c. My healing shawl looks beautiful thus far if I do say so myself. I’m really pleased with the dusty purple, pink, cream and gray combination. I feel good as I crochet each row and I think that’s an important part of the process, feeling happy. The pink is especially comforting to me because it was Johnny’s favorite color.

I miss you so much, Johnny. Yesterday, the chimes shuddered and clanged a lot in the wind.  I recalled the time you made every one of my chimes ring so you could hear each individual sound. You were surprised how many chimes I had and the stories behind some of them. You were surprised when I told you about the ones I had outside at the old house in Maine. One on each side of the house so when they chimed I knew what direction the wind was coming because they had distinct sounds. You know thought that was a great idea. I loved the chime that announced the north wind the best because of its tone but not because I loved the cold. The cold never fazed you. Me I’ve become more of a hot house flower as I age. Just so you know, when I was your age I didn’t mind the temperatures either.

Your Dad is busier than ever with your construction company. He can’t find enough men to man all the jobs he has lined up. He really misses your energy and enthusiasm so much. Jacob doesn’t seem to have the same interest in carpentry as you did at his age. Dad said, you were always getting involved in whatever project was happening.

The thunderstorms were interesting yesterday. The wind knocked over trees and the water rippled like ocean waves down the driveway for about an hour. Then the sun returned like nothing has happened. There were lots of power outages around us but we were fortunately blessed to not have any disruptions.

It took me a while this morning to clean up the driveway and front steps. My beautiful rose bushes lost many of their petals in the storm. I swept up the spent petals and added them to my compost bin before the lawn maintenance guys came around with those big gas powered leaf blowers and blew them into the garage. I’m still at a loss why they walk up the driveway blowing the debris toward the houses but they do. Anyway, the garage didn’t get covered in rose petals today.

Macavity ate the bloom I picked and brought inside. That silly boy has a rose fetish. If only he would eat his wet food with as much enthusiasm. Cats!

I finished the End of Everything by Megan Abbott yesterday. I’m going to post my review on Goodreads this afternoon. I’ve made a good dent in my pledged reading goal thus far. I said I would read twenty five books in 2020, thus far I have read fourteen and I have six months to go.

I chose Guns and Roses’ Patience to remind me that I need to be. Like the lyric in the song, sometimes I get so tense because I can’t speed up time.  We’ve talked about this before I’m not patient. Everyone assures me it will be alright. There are times that I want to scream at them … “It’s not your body with this damn disease inside trying to steal your life! Don’t tell me it will be alright. Patience! Fuck Patience! ”